Posted by: sparklingbloodredroses | May 15, 2009

Word Count?

So I was sitting here and realized that we should be writing some where around 500 words a day. (I believe that is what the TWE May Guidelines say) Well, I for one know I have not been doing that. School, projects and other things have gotten in the way. We’ve entered that end-of-year-have-to-finish-all-of-this-before-finals crunch where teachers try to cram things down our throats faster than we can swallow.

As I’m sure some of you may know; it’s pure torture.

Anyway, my ability to find time to write has been hindered for a good portion of the time until this week. I’ve done some “journaling” this week, most of which is documented on here, and be doing a lot of fictional writing because a few characters of mine have been sitting behind me, bugging me to do so. I’m up to 6,800 and some odd words which is good because it means I still have somewhat of a chance even if I am about a thousand or so words under today’s word count for TWE.

It’s funny how 500 words a day seems like so much word and so hard right now but when NaNoWriMo runs around we all murder ourselves trying to get to 50,000 words by the end of the month and writing over a thousand and one hundred words a day. How did I ever manage anything like that when I’m struggling so much right now?! It’s a bit annoying.

Oh well, I’m going to keep writing this month but I’m not sure how my word count is going to fair, we have a huge Art Figure Project due in less than two weeks which means I’m going to be glued to that more than I will be my computer or pad of paper. That is, unless, I finish the project early. Depending on how my English essay goes it may be quite possible to finish the Art project earlier.

We’ll see, I have my fingers crossed.  :)

Posted by: sparklingbloodredroses | May 15, 2009


Dug Bee?

Have you ever gone over what you have written after you’ve read it? Now, I’m not talking about immediately, I’m talking about leaving it, walking away and not coming back for quite awhile. Well, I was going over some old personal fan fiction writing and came across this strange word “Dug bee”. At first I wondered if I meant “dung beetles” but I’m not sure. This is the “quote”, a friend of my Main Character is commenting on her home and then she responds with the unknown wording. :

“Compared to the mountains this is heavenly, no one ever told me you had royalty in your blood.”

Yeah, well, my brother and I act more like dug-bees?”

Act like dug-bees? Am I the only one going crazy trying to figure out what this mysterious creature called a dug-bee is? I’m not aware such a thing even exists or, at least, I don’t remember it ever coming across it in the dictionary anyway.

Have you ever come across anything like this? It’s one of those times you read your work and go “What the heck was I thinking/trying to say” and, of course, no one can answer you!

Perhaps I’ll figure it out someday… ;)

Posted by: sparklingbloodredroses | May 12, 2009

A Funny Thought

It was today that I realized something interesting; you never truly know – or understand something – until you really sit down and look at it. Let me explain. As a person with the Disease I have I look at what I have an see that it’s realitively bad, compared to “normal” people but then I look at those other children and teens I’ve talked about and realize – “Wow, I have it pretty easy.” Or do I? I’ve spent my whole life living with this disease and, because of my care-free attitude I tend to make it seem like it’s nothing. My parents of all people can tell you that it is, my friends being the second who could.

Today I was in Biology class, sitting in the back with one of my friends from my girl scout troop – like usual. As we finished a work sheet that was passed around I saw her pull out sheet from her bag – from the corner of my eye I watched her carefully and realized: it was the Lyme “symptom” sheet. The previous night (last night rather) a woman I know came and tried to present information on Lyme to the members of my troop and a few of their family memebers. During that meeting she handed out a sheet of what the typical symptoms are (that does not mean everything mind you, as everyone is unique, but it’s generally similar through all peoples); the same sheet my friend had just extracted from her bag. While I finished my worksheet she checked off what symptoms she had, when she had finished she looked at me and said, “Man, I have a lot of these…I’m starting to worry.” We didn’t speak for a few minutes while a presentation was shown but afterward she asked me “How was it that you found out you had Lyme Disease?”

In spite of myself I laughed, “It was a long process,” I told her, “we spent a long time going from doctor to doctor trying to figure out what was wrong with me. One doctor, our old P.C.P. even tried testing me for arthritis and all these other things along with the E.L.I.Z.A. test. All came back negative. So, like we had before, we bounced from doctor to doctor until we reached the P.C.P we have now. He cared for me for a few years before we could figure out what was wrong. In fact, the  Western Blott testing for Lyme was a last-willed effort to figure out was wrong. If that wasn’t positive he didn’t know what he was going to do for me. Lo and behold, the Western Blott did come back positive, meaning I had anti-bodies currently fighting the bacteria and evidence of an older infection of it.” She said “wow” and we both went silent again, but not for long.

“How many of these did you – or do you- have?” She asked me abruptly. I hadn’t expected the question but looking back on it, I probably should have. With her allowance I leaned over and took her paper, making my check marks on the side of the boxes and not on them, like hers. “Wow” She told me when I finished, “That’s a lot.” Then, she counted up the numbers. She had 21 of the symptoms, a very large portion that indicates she is very likely to have the disease, and I had 31.

Thirty-one. Wow. Who would have thought? That number shocked me, as well as when I was going through and realized, “I have more things than I really think about in a day.” I may not be wheel-chair bound like some kids or having constant ear infections like my said friend but, I have my own problems. It’s such a weird thing to say but, I had a complete revelation, just from this conversation. Who would have thought?

Posted by: sparklingbloodredroses | May 11, 2009

Yes? Chronic Lyme? No?

-:Lyme Disease:-

Lyme, Connecticut, where it was first reported
an acute inflammatory disease that is caused by a spirochete (Borrelia burgdorferi) transmitted by ticks (genus Ixodes and especially I. dammini), that is usually characterized initially by a spreading red annular erythematous skin lesion and by fatigue, fever, and chills, and that if left untreated may later manifest itself in joint pain, arthritis, and cardiac and neurological disorders —called also Lyme
What is Lyme Disease? As a political ailment it is argued over constantly, especially Chronic Lyme and it’s co-infections. Does Chronic Lyme exist? A lot of MD’s will tell you no and, in there training their though process is true. However, if you talk to someone like me or others on the M. Lyme Disease Support Network who have been infected for years (in my case since I was four years old – perhaps even since birth) we will tell you that yes, Chronic Lyme does in fact exist. 

 Do only ticks carry Lyme Disease? Tests are being conducted, right now, to suggest that any animal that bites and sucks blood, can carry the disease. Therefore, if this is true the list would include mosquitos, fleas, some mites, and other such creatures on top of ticks.

Do only DEER ticks carry Lyme Disease? Ah, a most classic question and one that, with any political subject, has two sides. One “political part” per say, believes that yes, only DEER ticks carry Lyme while another believes that ALL ticks can carry it (you also have your wish-washy people in the middle).  As for my experience I have only ever been bitten by one type of tick – or at least only had one type ever pulled off of me – a dog (or wood) tick. When we pulled them off of me our doctors told us both times that they were dog ticks and to not worry. Now, well over a decade+ later, I am fighting a constant battle with Lyme Disease. It’s quite possible I was bitten by the Nymph tick, a spec about the size of the tip of your pen,  but nothing can prove that. Right now, all information on this question is inconclusive.

Another good question to go along with that one is the; Do ALL ticks carry Lyme Disease? Again, this question is unknown. It is common thought in a lot of Lyme groups that some ticks my carry Lyme while others may not, some may carry certain – if not all – co-infections while others may not and others my have them ALL. I think a better question to ask here is that if ticks live so long with this disease in them – why isn’t it destroying them like it is us?

Since I was four I’ve gotten tired extremely easily, my parents could go to the store for 2 ½ hours and within 30 minutes my dad had to carry me because I was so exhausted I was ready for a nap. Similar occurrences happened like that as I turned six, eight and even 12. To be frank, I never had much of a normal childhood. I’ve never played sports or run around in a field playing ball. I never had the *energy*.  So when I was 10 and 11 and my ability to function “normally” (or what was normal for me) declined it was easy to do it without my parents noticing or, for that matter, even me. I had pain in my hip when I walked, it ground together or popped often, my knees felt like I had injured them after too much running, when I exercised my back hurt and my muscles did too – making it so I was debilitated for days. It was like I was a 15-year-old girl in a 90 year old  body. As much pain as I was in I’d grown up with the similar since I was young so it was like my life; normal. The whole process wasn’t to me like it is to other kids who were superstar high school swimmers and now wheelchair bound. I didn’t wake up one day and was paralyzed, or lost my vision, or my career, or anything like that – I am blessed with how toned- down my version of the Disease is. These other kids woke up and were forever changed – missing that which they had before. I have nothing to miss, only to aspire for.

It wasn’t until I was 12 that we got anywhere with my deteriorating health. After having 3 severe sinus infections, one of which that spurred into a respiratory infection, we took matters into our own hands. I was tested for all sorts of things; rheumatoid Arthritis and the ELISA test for Lyme Disease included. I responded negative for them all. It was when we met an alternative DO Dr. M  who worked hard to figure out what was wrong with me and got to the point where Lyme Disease was the only option he could see. In one last good-faith effort he tested me with a Western blot and, what do you think should happen? I get a positive to having it in the past. From then on I knew I had Lyme Disease.

Where do you go from there? There are many different forms of treatment: antibiotics, alternative, half-and-half etc…also, there aren’t a lot of LLMD’s in our area. In truth, there were two semi-Lyme Literature doctors in our area – one of which is the one who diagnosed me and another which I eventually went to for further treatment; I now go to both. In those division options there are even MORE options. For alternative treatments you have Zhang which consists of mainly Chinese herbs, Bruner’s protocol, Cowden Protocol, etc…and similar with antibiotic and “half-and-half”. Of course, this isn’t even touching on the co-infections.

We tried more than one protocol and not one worked for me in a way that I could still function, so we went on the Zhang of which I don’t do the whole protocol and mix others together. It’s a constant mix and match battle of pills and drinks that may help us figure out what can “cure” me. Everything is individual, what may “cure” one person with Lyme may not cure another. Currently I take 20+ pills a day, but some people take more and others are on drip or pick-line anti-biotic.

Even if it doesn’t sound it, my situation is better than others. Although treatment has gone slowly, I am gradually improving even if it’s that I can stand a few minutes longer or stay up later with friends till 11 or 12. Lyme Disease now is where Aids was 20 years ago, misunderstood and not enough information. The only difference from the two, is that Lyme Disease itself isn’t deathly, you aren’t going to get cancer from it and die like you can with Aids but it is debilitating. The best thing, and hardest thing, you have to do when you have Lyme is to try and have a positive outlook on life because if you don’t, you can become bitter.

Let light and happiness shine and you’ll acquire more than you will with evil intentions and saucy words.


I have homework to tend to and sleep to acquire as we speak,


Love and Light,




{My appologies for formatting dysfunction, I tried making the very top part centered and space differently but for some reason WordPress did not pick it up.}



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